When to Burn the Bridges
Originally published on December 18, 2020.
Last Updated on March 2, 2024.
Confession. I’m a burn the bridges kinda guy. It’s how I’m wired. However, after a few years here on earth, I’ve learned to temper my burning desires in some situations.
When to Burn Away
Burning sometimes needs to happen when you are dealing with people. Friends, oftentimes family, sometimes spouses need to be burnt outta your life for you to move ahead. Typically these are interpersonal relationships. If they are:
- Needy
- Negative
- Untrustworthy
- Progressive
- Judgmental/Critical of everything
- Drunkard
- Busybody
- Users
Oh, this list can go on forever … basically, if they are dragging you down instead of building you up = burn ’em. Get those people out of your life. If you can’t trust them in battle to have your back, eventually they will hurt you; could be physically, but most certainly mentally. You already know who they are …
Don’t Burn – Leave the Way Intact
I have discovered that there are certain situations where you might need to distance yourself, but you don’t want to eliminate a way back.
This is primarily in the business setting.
We often burn bridges to companies as if the people working there are the company themselves. In the past I’ve burnt companies because I didn’t like the person I was dealing with. Then later found that many people had not liked dealing with that person and he/she had been eliminated by the company … except now I’m on the outside because I had treated the company as if they were just that person.
Same can happen in a work setting. Your boss or coworker might be a total life suck. You definitely have to decide just how much you will take, but understand that if they are truly a sh!tty person, they will eventually be eliminated anyway. You might have to bide your time rather than burning it all down.
Caveat. Some companies are built from the ground up as ‘progressive’ … these should be burnt out of your life. They can’t change because their identity is built on the premise of hate as a founding ideology. This is different than the case of a crappy human working in a decent company. If the mission statement is written in a way that you are a target instead of a client = burn baby burn.